You are not connected. Please login or register

View previous topic View next topic Go down Message [Page 1 of 1]

1 Sakusen on Thu Sep 04, 2014 9:53 pm

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin


Clan: Sakusen

Kekkei Genkai: Vectors

Elements: Up to user

Specialization: Ninjutsu

Location: Scattered

Clan History: Far from the nations of the world lived a Temple of men and women who focused on their own society. They rarely let in those who are outsiders to their community, the honor giving you a high status in their society. They trained their minds daily, their focus on mental capabilities and thus forged what is known as Telekinesis, they were able to control object with their mind, and as years went on their ability to control it down to the subatomic level was so intense that their society was so advanced beyond what any nation could have made.

However as the years went on their growing temple was soon taken note of from the surrounding nations and were attacked viciously from those wanting to capture the secrets and the leaders for their own advantage over the other villages. Soon however it was decided that the society would crumble onto itself, they would destroy their bodies and leave the world forever, they destroyed their temple and all the knowledge that lie within it. In their mass suicide there were some who defected from the train of knowledge that led on for generations. Every hundred years or so a person grows with the knowledge of their secrets.

Kekkei Genkai Description:

Ninjutsu

Vectors are a distant relative to the idea of telekinesis. They are created from the chakra of the user and on the same ideology of telekinesis can push and pull objects. The major difference becomes that no longer can brain waves control objects but that these "hands" controlled by the user have various uses and control over extended periods. These vectors lie on difference frequencies and thus will give them increased abilities with the higher their frequencies.


  • Low Frequency - These vectors are invisible. They have no use but to set up attacks. They are unable to harm anything or anyone at this level.

  • Medium Frequency - The vectors are now in a more tangible state and can be seen as a distortion in the air. They are capable of punching and using weapons given if the user themselves has the capability to use them. They can throw and lift objects and as well pull. They are capable of blocking attacks for the user given that the power does not exceed their endurance.

  • High Frequency - These vectors have a ghastly appearance to them at this point, fully capable of being seen. They can be used to smash, crush, cut and pierce their opponents. They are at their most powerful and all attacks made by these vectors are increased by one rank of strength. When using these vectors the user experiences doubled maintenance costs from chakra.


Drawbacks:

Because of their reliance on vectors each Sakusen must take Hesitant (Element) without balance.
Because of the reliance on vectors each elemental technique requires 10% increase in word count to learn.


Members: [Will be added when character is made]

Kekkei Genkai Jutsu:

Spoiler:
Name: Vector Control
Canon/Custom: Custom
Rank: D-S
Type: Offensive - Defensive - Supplementary
Element: None
Range: 5m-15m
Specialty: Ninjutsu
Duration: Constant
Cooldown: Two Posts
Description:Each rank has their own set amount of vectors they can use at a given time. Each vector follows the guidelines of speed and damage as well as the chakra guidelines, each rank paying their respective chakra cost per post no matter how many vectors they are using. High frequency vectors gain one rank of strength. Each pair of vectors are capable of creating handseals to preform jutsu using the users chakra.


  • D Rank - - 2 Vectors that can extend up to 5m
  • C Rank -- 4 Vectors that can extend up to 7m
  • B Rank - - 6 Vectors that can extend up to 9m
  • A Rank - - 8 Vectors that can extend up to 11m
  • S Rank - - 10 Vectors that can extend up to 15m


  • D Rank - & 1/4" cuts,
  • C Rank - heavy bruises & 1/2" cuts,
  • B Rank - 1" cuts and light fractures,
  • A Rank - 2.5" cuts and broken bones.
  • S Rank - 4" cuts, can take off a limb with a direct hit, but unable to bisect an opponent unless within high frequency.


  • E Rank - 0-5mp/s
  • D Rank - 5-15m/s
  • C Rank - 15-25m/s
  • B Rank - 25-35m/s
  • A Rank - 35-45m/s
  • S Rank - 45-70m/s


Each individual vector is capable of defending ninjutsu. Each vector can withstand one jutsu of its rank, adding another for each rank below its own, I.E B-rank vectors can withstand 3 ninjutsu.

If three vectors are destroyed by various ninjutsu the technique enters a 2 post cooldown.
However if a technique above rank of a vector will automatically put the technique in cooldown.

Interaction with physical items, weapons, taijutsu are based on two stats.

The user of the vectors must have an endurance stat above the opponents strength to effectively withstand the attack. However each vector can only withstand three attacks from an opponent with any rank strength under the users endurance. Three vectors destroyed will put the technique in cooldown. However an opponent with a strength stat above the users endurance stat will immediate put the technique on cooldown.

Each vector destroyed while the technique is still active is put on a 2 post cool down before it can be recreated



Last edited by Yuuto Uzumaki on Wed Feb 11, 2015 1:25 pm; edited 12 times in total

2 Re: Sakusen on Fri Sep 05, 2014 1:20 pm

Ryuusei

avatar

D-Rank
Telekenises is prohibited, yo

3 Re: Sakusen on Fri Sep 05, 2014 8:46 pm

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin
Bump for lookyloos

4 Re: Sakusen on Sat Sep 06, 2014 10:59 am

Ryuusei

avatar

D-Rank
If low tier vectors are invisible and intangible than they also need to be completely useless in every way. Chakra does not simply pass through objects and anything involving spacial manipulation falls under space/time which is banned.

The higher levels need to be completely visible.

They can not use any vectors without expending chakra. I expect this to be a jutsu.

5 Re: Sakusen on Sat Sep 06, 2014 5:29 pm

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin
Can there be a lessened chakra pool?

6 Re: Sakusen on Sat Sep 06, 2014 10:09 pm

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin
Ready to go

7 Re: Sakusen on Mon Sep 08, 2014 11:04 am

Bokuden

avatar

S-rank
The chakra cost for the vector arms is the jutsu itself, also no on the extra arms for extra chakra if it's not part of the jutsu write up.


____

:10


"Good and evil are just words. It is not my place to judge their worthiness."

Character Bio | Jutsu List | Item Locker

Bukijutsu-SS|Ninjutsu-SS|Fuuinjutsu-D|Medical-D||Raiton-SS|Suiton-SS|Katon-S|Doton-D

Mission List: D:12 | C:4 | B:3 | A:6 | S:2 | SS:0

8 Re: Sakusen on Mon Sep 08, 2014 6:02 pm

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin
Edited.

9 Re: Sakusen on Fri Sep 12, 2014 6:49 am

Bokuden

avatar

S-rank
The jutsu only scales to S, remove the scaling at kage rank.

The vectors' damage should scale with jutsu rank, independent of the user's strength, and how they interact with jutsu needs to be specified.

Also, remove the bit about creating extra arms. The amount you have at each rank should be enough.


____

:10


"Good and evil are just words. It is not my place to judge their worthiness."

Character Bio | Jutsu List | Item Locker

Bukijutsu-SS|Ninjutsu-SS|Fuuinjutsu-D|Medical-D||Raiton-SS|Suiton-SS|Katon-S|Doton-D

Mission List: D:12 | C:4 | B:3 | A:6 | S:2 | SS:0

10 Re: Sakusen on Sun Feb 08, 2015 1:06 am

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin
I require this to be examined for any impurities, so i may use my almighty holy edit button to purge them.

11 Re: Sakusen on Tue Feb 10, 2015 5:27 am

Ayakashi

avatar



Okay, you're beginning to look good <3

Just a few more things, sadly one of them is not so small.

As it stands your clan has bar none, the most powerful defensive technique in all of Saga, save one, which needs to be revamped. >.> (*cough* mitsuhide)

You say each individual Vector can withstand a jutsu of equal rank or 2 lower or three lower than that etc (would like you to make that clearer) I'd like you to make that a jutsu of equal rank destroys a vector, and 2 lower etc, But I also want you to say that if a Vector is hit by a technique of 1 rank 'higher' or if you lose 3 vectors to various techniques I want this 'jutsu' to end, meaning it goes on a cool-down until you use another vector jutsu, or something, but you cannot simply have a jutsu which lets you at S rank to block 20 S rank techniques be on constantly... I'm sorry.

You need to specify how fast, and how much damage they do at each rank, the jutsu rules give ranges of damage, and considering its still potent defensive ability, i would like these damages to not even be close to the 'full' damage value of each rank. And I would like the rank of strength/ item needed to destroy each rank defined a little better than you have it.

D rank bruises & 1/4" cuts, C rank heavy bruises & 1/2" cuts, B rank 1" cuts and light fractures, A rank 2.5" cuts and broken bones. S rank 4" cuts, can take off a limb with a direct hit, but unable to bisect an opponent. Would be acceptable.

With that, your 1 rank increase of damage with high frequency is fine, simply specify that high frequency enables you at S rank to bisect an opponent. But i would like a downside for using the high frequency variant, otherwise no-one would ever use the lesser one.


____



~ Jutsu List ~ Aya's Stats ~ Item Lockup ~ Jutsu Rej ~
Theme Song
Taijutsu SS-Bukijutsu SS-Senjutsu S || Fuuton SS-Suiton SS-Hyouton SS

EP: 5

12 Re: Sakusen on Wed Feb 11, 2015 1:27 pm

Yuuto Uzumaki

avatar

Genin
I believe I've made the appropriate corrections.

I have properly displayed the jutsu's interaction with both ninjutsu and physical items or taijutsu.

High frequency vectors are double the chakra cost.

All vectors destroyed while the technique is still active are on a 2 post cooldown before they are to be recreated.

Properly displayed the speed and damages according to the guidelines and the ones you've provided respectively.

13 Re: Sakusen on Fri Feb 13, 2015 1:35 am

Ayakashi

avatar



A cool-down of 2 is not going to fly. Make it 3 for the lowest rank and then + 1 post for each rank above that is used. (If people want to be creative, and app a technique which allows this jutsu to come off cooldown, that is up to them. But usually maintainable techniqes, especially strong ones like this, Have cooldowns of like "double the duration." which, feel free to use if it is easier.)

You missed out the light bruises on the D rank damage <3

You copied the speed ranges, please pick a definitive speed for each rank, and do not make it too high. And, you can remove the E rank one <3. I would allow, 5 for D rank, 10 for C rank, 20 for B rank, 40 for A rank, and 50 for S rank. Then you have like a nice kinda bell curve for power.

Oh, and I would like you to only be able to switch the type of vectors you use, once per turn, and I would like it to cost some chakra to do so. maybe 10? Which at higher ranks is nothing.

I guess you just have to understand how 'powerful' this technique is on saga. even with the nerfs I've been giving it, believe me, if i was at the wheel of this technique, i would not lose.

Also, in future, when you bump your clan, could you please post in the Requests thread.

Danke~


____



~ Jutsu List ~ Aya's Stats ~ Item Lockup ~ Jutsu Rej ~
Theme Song
Taijutsu SS-Bukijutsu SS-Senjutsu S || Fuuton SS-Suiton SS-Hyouton SS

EP: 5

Sponsored content



View previous topic View next topic Back to top Message [Page 1 of 1]

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum

Naruto and Naruto Shippuuden belong to Masashi Kishimoto.