You are not connected. Please login or register

View previous topic View next topic Go down Message [Page 1 of 1]

1 Untitled Novel, WiP, Opinions welcomes. on Sun 16 Nov 2014, 12:35



Chapter 1* (Unfinished, just a teaser)

I open my eyes as the water from the ocean streams down the side of my face. I am alone out at sea with nothing but a single boat. No land can be seen in the horizon. An overwhelming sense of freedom flows through my mind and body as I kick my feet to stay afloat. I wipe the water from my eyes and run my hands through my hair. Before another small wave could crash against the side of the boat I dive under. The need for goggles in unnecessary as the water is so clear and does not burn my eyes or obscure the beautiful sight of all the colorful fish. My legs kick harder and I dive deeper as the sunlight begins to dim. I feel as if my lungs could keep me under the water for days. As I go deeper down the water becomes colder and darker and after a few minutes I can barely see anything but a single glowing piece of seaweed extending up from the sandy bottom. I get closer and wrap my hand around it and gently pluck it from the ocean’s soil.

A strong suction pulls me down toward the small hole I created when I pulled the seaweed out. The hole slowly grows larger as the sand falls in it. I look toward the surface and begin to swim toward it as fast as I can. The suction causes me to only swim in place. I strain as I push myself to swim harder and faster. A yell escapes my lips as I try and escape the strong current. It is then that I hear a voice coming through the water, “wake up”. The voice is that of a woman’s it is a gentle soothing tone. I stop my struggle and I sink downward being pulled in through the dark hole at the bottom of the ocean. I feel cold again blinded by the darkness that has surrounded me as more voices talk around me. I close my eyes seeing no point in keeping them open when I cannot see.
“He seems stable.”
“Get ready to move him.”
“He’s waking up.”

I open my eyes and am now being blinded by the brightness of the room around me. A long tube is coming up from my mouth and toward the ceiling. I flail my arms reaching for it unable to breathe. Panic sets in as I realize I am in a giant glass tank barely large enough for a man. Water drains out from below me into the floor. I still cannot breathe but my hands grasp around the tube as I yank it out and begin coughing. Pain is now shooting from my mouth as I cough and realize pulling out the tube the way I had damaged my throat on the way out. I feel heavy as I fall to the ground as the last bit out water exits through the drain. Coldness sets in as I shiver, the door to the tube opens up and a middle aged woman in a lab coat wraps a warm towel around me and begins to dry me and warm me up with the motion of her hands. Who are these people? What am I doing here? What is happening? To many questions fill my mind and my instinct to resist and fight kicks in as I kick my legs trying to stand up and run away. Two men rush toward me as I try and hold me down their lab coats loosely wrapped around them as it takes them both to hold me down.

“Sedate him!” One of them yells as the other takes a needle out from his coat and uses his teeth to pull off the safety cap. The next thing I know I feel a sharp prick and feel liquid entering my body before my eye lids grow heavier and I lose all my will to fight. “Put him in the observation cell. I want this one to live,” it is the last thing I hear before I fall asleep.

The next time I wake up I am staring at a concrete ceiling with bright fluorescent lights. I squint and sit upright and look around to see where I have been confined to. My throat is still burning with pain when I breathe. Speaking would only hurt worse so I refrain from doing so. The room I am in is small just long enough to fit a single twin bed in. The door is metal and the same concrete color as the room. I examine it noticing how it is made of thick reinforced steel and the hinges were just as strong. I ponder for a moment on how I know these things just from observing visually. It is only when I try to remember how I would know such facts that I realize I do not remember anything before waking up in the tank earlier. Looking around the room further I find a camera in the corner a little red light on it indicating that it is on.

I wait for what seems like half a day though without a method of telling time it could have been a lot shorter. I am lying on my small uncomfortable bed when I hear the door to my cell begin to open. I sit up and train my eyes on the door ready to fight my way out if I see the opportunity. To my surprise I almost feel a bit of relief as an older man walks into the room alone. He is wearing a red Hawaiian shirt and blue jeans which is very different from the room and he stands out like a sore thumb. His face is calming and I no longer feel threatened. He runs his hand through what little hair he has left as he focuses his brown eyes on me from behind his glasses that make him look a million times more intelligent than his shirt.

    “I am Doctor Reitz. I am overseeing your health while you are here as a guest. I am to make sure you remain healthy and alive while you undergo the training. I will also be observing you to make sure you are mentally strong,” He says as he paces the room slowly. He then walks toward me and moves aside the white jacket I was given and it is also the first time I notice I am wearing clothes. I am in a pair of white pants that seems to be more fit for athletics and the jacket I am wearing is also the case though I have no shirt on underneath.

    “Let us see what number they gave you, 359. Interesting this would explain why you were trusted to me,” Dr. Reitz says to himself. I look down to look at what he looked at and just under my collar bone near my pectoral muscle is a tattoo of the number ‘359’. I want to ask what it means but my throat is still damaged and as I try to speak I only cough slightly as barely a whisper comes out.

    “I suppose you have questions you would like to ask but we need to get you something for your throat first. If you would like answers 359 follow me and don’t try to do anything reckless, I won’t hurt you,” he says as he stands up to leave out the only door. I am not quite sure why but I believe him and if I want to get the answers I am looking for I need to be with him, for now at least. I stand up and slowly follow him out the door, my muscles only barely cooperating as it feels like the first time I am using them in years. The Doctor also slows his pace down for my benefit as I follow him own the barren concrete walls of the building.

After a long ten minutes of walking we enter what appears to be a lab. I recognize it as I follow the Hawaiian shirt across the room past the man sized tube I had been released from only yesterday. At the other end of the lab is a chair much like a dentist’s chair. The doctor gestures me to sit and I do without hesitation. The chair itself locks me in place as straps close around my wrist and ankles. I remain calm though feeling as if I have done this before.

“Here 359 drink this it will help your throat heal,” he says as he hands me a vial of red liquid. I take it and drink it without hesitation. It tastes much like cold medicine but it soothes my throat as I breathe properly for the first time in a while.

“Where am I?” I manage to ask with a raspy voice as I look up at the man who is connecting wires to my body as his assistant the middle ages female sticks electrodes to my body.
“All in good time 359. Right now just relax and I will tell you everything soon enough. After all, they require us to.”


Dameon Shikyo
Sannin|Anbu Captain|Seven Swordsman|Kirigakure
Raiton: SS Rank|Ninjutsu: SS Rank|Kenjutsu: S Rank|Genjutsu: A Rank

Actual Stats (After +1/-1's)




Loved it couldnt think of anything wrong with it i would read more if you write more

View previous topic View next topic Back to top Message [Page 1 of 1]

Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum

Naruto and Naruto Shippuuden belong to © Masashi Kishimoto.